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| This is my tracting area. The castle building is a restaurant. We teach people in all the homes you see. |
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| Grandpa Snow passed away Dec 1 1976 |
This is the ward activityOctober 10, 1976
Another Sunday in Altona. We left at 7:30 and got home at 8:30. We really had some neat things happen to us. First I was sitting in Priesthood Meeting and Sister Fricke opened the door and called me out. She said there was a young girl on the phone that wanted to know about the Church. She was really great! The story was that she had really had a hard time finding the Geminde but now had gotten the number, called, and wanted to know more. Well she and her father came at 12:30 and we taught them a “C” discussion. It went really well. We made an appointment for Saturday and they left. It was really good. They even live in our area. I was really tickled. The Lord really blessed us.
After eating at Sister Kunerts we barely made it back to Church. In church Elder Rogers and I blessed the sacrament side by side. I thought that was cool.
The Zone Leaders came to church and also to District Meeting. We had a good meeting and it was a great experience. The Lord has really blessed us in so many things. I feel really good about the District.
It was a great day. I really felt the Lord’s blessing today.
October 11, 1976
This morning we had a tough time getting started. We both got a lot of Post but Elder Rogers didn’t get any from his girlfriend. That makes it 3 weeks. He is really down about it. Last night we had a good talk about a lot of things. He gets down on himself for not being able to speak the language so perfect or understand everything yet. It bothers him and right now it shouldn’t. He is really doing great. As a golden he already has up through F. That’s fantastic. I really think the world of him.
We had a great discussion tonight. Herr de Decker and his girlfriend and another guy. It went really well. They believe on Joseph Smith but they also believe on all the other things too. It went great though. I was really impressed. It was clean down on Stanilweg though – we got home at 10:30. Na, ja, I guess it was worth it.
October 13, 1976
Today I fasted. For many reasons. The main reason was to better strengthen my testimony to better obtainment of the power of God to the convincing of men of the truth, like it says in my Patriarchal blessing. There are people here that can be touched by my testimony. I just need to develop more faith in order to reach this goal I have set for myself. I also fasted today for my father, Richard, that he would be touched by the special letter I sent last week to the effect to come along and make progress in the church. I also fasted or am fasting for Sister Temme and my companion. Elder Rogers is really down. His stupid girlfriend hasn’t written for almost 4 weeks now and that hasn’t helped a bit. She really is a bite. She supposedly sent letters almost every other day but he hasn’t received any for 3 weeks now. It’s really a pit. He sure is down. Even as I write he is in the kitchen, kneeling, praying, and I hear sniffles. I feel so bad. There are a lot of pressures on him right now. I pray for him.
We have had a pretty rough week because of his feelings at this time and etc., etc. We sure need the Lords help.
Yesterday we were ausstausched with the Sisters. It was a good day. I worked with Sister Maples and Elder Cram. We had a great day together. Taught 3 discussions and really had a good day.
Well my time is up. I pray that the Lord will bless my dad, my companion, our investigators and all. I sure need a lot of help.
JR: After I sent the letter and all it was a time before I heard from Mom what happened. Well, as it turns out, Mom made Rich read it himself. He read it and then didn’t say anything. She said that’s a good sign. She remembers the day when she would hear him laugh over the idea of getting active in the Church. He has let these things seep into his heart and in due time they will work this way out and he will follow the Saviors voice. I sure love them both and know the Lord hears and will answer my prayers. I believe that he’ll make it.
October 14, 1976
What a great day. It wasn’t really until tonight and then it was. Tonight we had an F.A. with our Golden family the Behns. It went so well. They are a beautiful family. I really am thankful, oh so thankful that we are able to meet them and have a chance to talk to them about everything. We are just getting started but they are so great. We had a beautiful evening. A family home evening the way it should be done. They have 2 neat kids. Philip is a little feisty but Oliver is the greatest. He is so smart. I really love him. I love the whole family. It’s the wish of my heart to be able to teach and baptize them. I pray that the Lord will touch them and lead and guide us to be humble tools in his hands to bring this family back to him. They are so great. I have faith, and I know it can happen. I believe they are from the House of Ephraim and are entitled to all his complete blessings. More than anything I love the Spirit that we have when we are with this family.
The rest of the day wasn’t as good. This morning we visited the Elders and found brother Kettner sick. He has been for 2 or 3 days. I really wonder about them. They are doing so well. I hope that things will continue to be so. After we wasted time with them we came home and looked up a couple of Golden Cards and inactive members. Boy, we got a few negative answers. I sure wonder what will happen to these people who fall away.
We also taught Prinjers an F discussion. It was really beautiful, and also really schade. They couldn’t understand all of it like they did last time. They are very open but they don’t want it very bad. It was a great discussion. We were able to go all the way through, and I really like the F. I hope they will sincerely study and pray now.
We also stopped by Sister Temme. She is really hardening her heart to the truth. She is a fine lady but I’m beginning to wonder what the desires of her heart are.
I fasted yesterday and I really felt good today. Elder Rogers too. The Lord has really blessed us.
Zone Conference
October 16, 1976
After that special Conference yesterday I am really high. Today we had a great experience with Fraulein Walbaum. She is Golden. She wants to believe so bad and she has already felt the Spirit and wants to feel more. She is really great. The only problem is the fact she is 17 and we can’t hardly teach her alone. We might have to bring in the sisters this time if her mother isn’t already there. Na ja whatever. She sure is good though. I know with her attitude like it is and with the efforts she is making she will make a fine member. It’s exciting to watch. The Lord has really blessed us.
October 17, 1976
Today was Elder Roger’s first talk in German in Church. He gave a beautiful talk on Joseph Smith. It was tremendous. He sure had a hard time all week thinking about it, but when he finally gave it, it was great.
Fricke’s had 6 of us for dinner today. They ate in the kitchen it was so much, but they enjoyed it and so did we. It was a great Sunday. We also had 2 young guys in Church. One I met on the Ausstellung.
October 18, 1976
Today we were ausstausched with Sister Young. My companion and I took her and the other Elders took Sister Maples for the Tausch. It was pretty neat. I really enjoy working with the sisters. We had a pretty good day. This afternoon we went to Pinjer’s and they told us Tschuss. It was bad because I felt like she was being pushed by him. I also felt bad because they couldn’t feel the power of our words. I hope they will continue to read and pray. He said he’d prayed and felt good about staying Evangalisch. Tcha. I felt down, but I tried, the best I could.
We also had De Decker tonight. That went great. They are really neat. Fed us Abendbrot. We gave them a complete D. It was really neat. They are starting to grasp the importance of our message. It was a neat experience.
October 19, 1976
Today we had a very beautiful experience with Behns. We finally taught them a “C”. It was great. The Lord really blessed us. We had a little problem with him. He says, because he is an engineer and has to believe everything so exactly that he can’t believe some of the things we tell him. Well it started to get rough right about Leitgedanke 6. We testified hard, went into the book of Mormon and finished out the discussion. Right before we left he looked at me and said “You know, you two have brought something into my home that has been missing for a long time.” The Spirit was really strong. The Lord really blessed me tonight. We really had a great discussion. They are a beautiful family.
October 20, 1976
This morning Elder Williams called me up. He gave us the word that Elder Rogers would be going to Eppendorf. Elder Gray had told me a little about it Monday but it came through officially today. We should actually have transferred today but we had the Opera tonight and I wanted to have Elder Rogers see that together with the District before he left. It was kind of a bite for me. A sad day to see my Golden leave. We sure had some good times together. I really felt it an honor and a privilege to have such a great Elder as a companion. Elder Gary Lee Rogers will go a long way. I’m proud of him. He sure has made a lot of progress in 10 weeks.
Tonight we went to the Opera. Don Carlos. Wow that was good. It cost us 14 marks but it was really great. I loved the music the orchestra in front was superb. I really like the Fine Arts better each time I come in contact with the high class stuff. This Opera surely was cool. I enjoyed the singing and everything. It really was neat. Don Carlos. I want to study this one a little.
Well tomorrow I get a new companion. I really don’t know what to think of it. Elder Rogers and I sure have had good times. He might be the only Golden I ever have. We did a good job together. Tomorrow I receive Elder Davis as a companion. That will start another page. I hate to end this one though – it sure has been a productive and happy one!
October 22, 1976
Preparation Day, again. They come and go like hours do it seems. Although time going by fast I know it is not always easy. With this new companion change my situation has completely changed. I sure miss good old Elder Rogers II. That laugh of his the neatest. He sure was a good companion. Now with Elder Davis things are really quiet. It’s going to take me a while to get used to his personality and sense of humor. He’s a lot different than most of us. He’s a great Elder though and I’m making every effort I can to love him and teach him the best I can. He doesn’t know how to cook or anything which is kind of a bite. He says they ate a lot of haverflacken up in Norderstedt. Cold, dry, Oatmeal with milk on it – like cereal – yuck! Oh, like all things we will get going and he’ll start grasping in a day or two what its all about.
We taught Fraulein Wallaum and her mother today. That was pretty good. They think they need a long time to come to these things. I feel the Lord’s Spirit in my teaching because I sure can understand the discussions and how to teach. It feels really good there, but I still feel at times that I am not coming across in the way to stimulate conversation. I surely need to commune with God more to know what to do. Maybe it’s because we haven’t found the right people or maybe it’s because we are not teaching the things that will reach them. I need to do some thinking and communion with God.
October 23, 1976
Today we had the Auestelling again. I met a nice old lady who told us to stop by and she’d give me an old Bible. That’s what we did. She gave me an old 1913 Jubiliams Bible. It’s fantastic. In great shape too. I’ll be able to get lots of good language study out of that old lady. It’s great. We also taught Hidalgo and I tonight. Mal sehen.
October 24, 1976
Another Sunday. Sister Young gave a beautiful talk in Church today – her last – on Joseph Smith. It was great. The Sisters leave in 10 days. They sure are wondering what’s going to happen with the area they are working in. It’s a real pain for all of us. I also had good companion interview with Elder Davis today. I came right and told my feelings about all – and he realized it too. It was a good experience. We’ll grow together.
October 26, 1976
It’s really hard to believe but I have been gone 18 months today. ¾’s of my Mission is over with today. It has been a very fruitful year and ½. I have really had a lot of experiences these past few months.
I want to try and express myself as to the feelings I feel at this time. As I told Elder Davis Sunday in companion inventory there is a certain pressure involved with being a Missionary. As I rode the bus to Church the sun was just coming up. It was early and I looked out and saw a Camero just like Marc Harrison’s sitting in a driveway of an apartment house. Its not that I liked the car and wanted to get one – materialistic – it was just that it reminded me of a Sunday morning at home. Sunday was always pretty lax for me. It was then I realized what a real pressure it is to be a Missionary. A constant feeling of being employed by the Lord. It’s a good feeling. I really enjoy it, but I believe if you are doing it right after two years you are ready to take a rest. Right now I know I have the most important part of my Mission ahead of me. I have had many wonderful experiences and learned many wonderful things but I carry around a big lump in my heart and side. A lump that comes from not baptizing people. This is a hard Mission and I know many Missionaries that never really baptize and sometimes lose that lump, and others like Elder Page that work their whole Missions and then finally before they go it happens. It’s really weird, but I know I have this lump in my breast and I know that the Lord wants to bless me and my attitude is good. It’s hard sometimes, oh it’s hard but I am going to put everything I have into reaching my goals. My first goal is 7 baptisms this year. It’s now a test of my faith.
But I believe or hope to believe where the first 3 are. And that’s one family the Behn’s. They are so neat. Tonight we taught them a D and kneeled in prayer with them before we left. It’s so neat. He told us tonight that their whole about life and the kids and everything has changed since we came. The Spirit has blessed their house. I am working hard to strengthen my sometimes weak faith to be able to help and lead this family back to God. It’s so beautiful. The Lord has blessed all of us.
October 27, 1976
Tonight we had another neat experience with De Deckers. We taught them an F discussion and then challenged them to baptism. It’s the first baptismal challenge I have given in a long time. They couldn’t accept the challenge as to say yes they would – but they did say they would as soon as they strengthened their testimonies. They believe Joseph was a Prophet but they can’t believe he restored the only true church. It’s a little tough for them but they are really great and I know now that they are concerning themselves with the question of authority in Baptism they will start making progress.
They are really messed up with the Hindu and East religions. They are quite weird anyway but really nice. They are two of the nicest people I have met in a long time. The trouble is, they meditate and are really involved in this other stuff. It’s really weird. It’s hard for them to concentrate on Christ when they have all these other things on their minds.
Lately I have really been meeting a lot of people with all these different ideas. The Germans for most part go to church or belong to the Church because of traditions. They are devout Protestants, but you ask them if they believe in God or on an afterlife and they are very skeptical.
And then there is another group, like the guy Elder Kettner and I met Monday when we were working together. We were tracting and these two workers started staring at us. Finally one came up and started yelling at us in English, asking us why we needed Joseph Smith when we had Jesus Christ. He was from Lebanon a converted Communist and he said Jesus Christ saved him, and he knew he was going to live forever. Well he was right and that’s my point. When these people as they say “let Jesus into their hearts” they are saved, but they can’t realize what it means to inherit the Celestial Kingdom. I am beginning to understand a lot better, deeper into these things. We are here to search out and find the elect and these other people who get made at us are really the ones that are hurting. They are satisfied with a Terr. Glory and won’t hear us when we talk of a Celestial one. It’s sad but it’s true. I felt bad for the guy. He said J.C. was in his heart and since Joseph had “only” seen him he was better than J.S. It was sad.
October 28, 1976
Today we had the opportunity of working with the Assistants to the President. I worked with Elder Jack Ross Williams. He was Elder Blackhams Golden right before I was. I think a lot of him. It was a fulfilling day for me because of many things. I learned a lot from Elder Williams, but he learned a few things from me. It was a great experience because it partially fulfills a goal I set for myself long ago – to be prepared good enough to be able to be called to Assistant and be able to handle the responsibilities. It would be a different task, but I feel I could do it with some help from the Lord. I sure would rather work in my own gegend and bring people along though. For both I am thankful.
October 29, 1976
Today was a rough P-day. We didn’t get anything done but we had a good day. We challenged Fraulein Walbaum to baptism. She couldn’t accept a date but she is going to be thinking about it. It was a rough discussion. Tonight we went to a special deal.
I dropped Elder Davis off at the Office. Elders Thornack, Crane, Gerry and I went to a special Vortrag. It was a Fencing Club and Fraternity at the University. It was quite an experience. Elder Gerry told a little about the Church and then we showed the film “Ancient America Speaks.” They then opened up to questions. This one guy was really prepared to shoot us down. He asked us about Alma 11:44 the restoration after the resurrection so I had him read it to clear it up and then he had other questions that we cleared him up on. Finally he got a little irritated and asked us about the Book itself, why we had changed it and all. I said Tcha, so we can easily find Alma 11:44. Boy the whole place about came down. They knocked on the table for me and the works. That guy felt pretty small. After that it went a lot better. We were able to sell 4 B of M’s and get 2 or 3 addresses. It was an old Club. Old Germany at its best. It was neat. A good day.
Sunday, October 31 – Halloween
My heart is full as I try to write a few words tonight. This was one of the most beautiful days of my Mission. Today our family Behn came both to Sunday School and to Church. They were really touched by both. The kids came with them this morning and the parents came alone in the evening. It was so special.
I gave one of the talks tonight. I talked on the F discussion, actually about Spiritual truth and Spiritual Freedom. What the blessings of the Gospel bring to all people. It was probably the best talk I have ever given auf Mission. I know the Lord helped me with it. I fasted from Sat to Sunday noon and the Lord really recognized my efforts. I was really blessed. So were our investigators.
President Royland also spoke. He said basically the same thing I did. And then he gave some or one story – the one about Sister Franke in Berlin. It brought everything out about baptism. It was a very good experience for the people that were there. It was a very special meeting.
Afterwards Behns had to go because they left the kids home but they were still pretty impressed. President Roylance did talk with De Deckers for a few minutes. He and I also had a little talk. They sure mean a lot to me (the little talks he and I have) I sure love that man.
As I said I fasted for help on my talk. Well after lunch I went into a room of the church and knelt alone to pray for help. As I prayed for Behns the warmest feeling came over me. Then again before the meeting after I had prepared my talk and all I was praying for help and right before I closed I asked the Lord to bless them to be able to come to Church. As I said these words the Spirit just shot through me. I knew they were coming. I have been trying for a long time to get to know the Spirit better and tonight was sort of a test and sure enough right before the meeting they slipped in. What a special experience. What a special witness the Lord gave me. They had to be to that meeting. It was meant that way. The Lord wants them in the Church. Now I pray for his help to make it happen.
November 1, 1976
I had the opportunity t talk with President Roylance today. We had our bi-monthly interviews. The new system is really good. We used to have the Conference and the interviews the same day. This way the President himself is there for the whole Zone Conference and he just teaches us. The Last Conference was really a special experience. So are the interviews.
He gives each of us twenty minutes, not like the old rushed interviews of President Schwendiman. I sure love both men but President Roylance is sure showing us what responsibility in the Church means. He sure is special.
We had a good talk. We considered the problems of the District and my investigators. It was about a month ago when I talked to him about the goal Elder Rogers and I missed of baptizing in September. President Roylance asked me if I was feeling better and reminded me of how discouraged I was. It did me good. I guess I was pretty down. I know now I think that it just takes more prayer, work and sacrifice than we gave. I don’t know what else it could be really. But we talked about it and I told him how things were going for us. He really understands us, he really does. He also gives sincere praise. I’m sure he says this to all his leaders and probably most Seniors but he always tells me that I’m one of his key – missionaries. I’m one of the ones that will make this all happen – what we are trying to do. He really builds me up. I’m sure he does that with everyone but you sure feel like you’re special to him. He sure does love us. I sure thank the Lord that I can work with this man of God. He is the kind of man I want to be.
My heart is really full as I ponder the things I have learned from President Roylance. My Patriarchal Blessing says I will marvel at what is accomplished in my field of labor. At first I thought that meant the marvelous change I saw and felt in myself. Now I realize the true and deeper meaning. Since President Roylances arrival our Mission has had a complete change-around. We baptized 33 people last month. That’s the most in one month for 15 years. In four months he’s done that. I marvel. It’s happening. And I can see it growing from here. One more thing before I close. He said in my interview that my talk last night was great. He said I was a good student. That’s true- but what a teacher he is – I’ve learned it from him!
November 2, 1976
We had a good long discussion with Behn’s tonight. Too long actually. They are so great. We started with an F discussion and tonight the man ideas. It was to well done but they had heard most of it and understood pretty well what we meant. I didn’t know whether to go through all of it and hit the main points or split it or what. We finally decided to go for it and I explained most of it and we challenged them. They couldn’t accept the challenge but now understand what is in store for them. We did a lot of things wrong I guess but I know the Lord loves this family. He will bless us to teach them better. They’ll make it. I have faith in them. This is the Lords work and he will bless them.
November 5, 1976
Well a lot of things have happened in the past few days. Sister Young and Sister Maples flew home this morning. This has been quite an experience. I really am going to miss those two. We have spent the last two days getting them settled in and getting the two new sisters – Sister Leininger and Sister Amacher up and settled in. I have made about ten trips to Krupender. My arms are about ready to fall off. This has really been quite an experience.
Sister Young and Sister Maples sure didn’t know what to think. They really couldn’t believe it was real. I couldn’t either. Sister Young and I were really close. She sure is a special girl. It was hard to say good-bye. She was the very first Missionary I met as I went into the Mission Home, over 18 months ago. I remember thinking how the Sisters only had 18 months and how short that really was. Now I can’t believe it’s gone. As the plane took off my heart sure had a funny feeling – a big lump in it. I’m sure going to miss those two.
It now closes another chapter but opens the next. Sisters Leininger and Amacher are really something. Both brand new. Sister Leininger is 7 weeks here in Germany and Sister Amacher is a Goldenin. They don’t know anything! Elder Kettner is sick so I went with Elder Pillmann today and challenged their best guy to baptism. My District sure needs me. I really have a lot of responsibilities now.
November 7, 1976
Today was Sunday. A very beautiful Sunday. Every day is so full of happenings and this last week has really been full. Before I go on with the things of today I want to go back and relate a couple of things that happened last night.
We had met two ladies tracting. Well after a couple of times we finally got in and taught them a C. Well last night we went to make a call back and invite them to Church. As we walked up the steps one of them (they are sisters) said or rather asked us why we had come. She was a little upset. Well I really didn’t know what to say. Finally she invited us in for a minute and then really started asking us why and all. She was a little irritated. Well the Lord put the words into my mouth and I told her that we were representatives of the Lord come to leave a prayer in her home. The Spirit was really bad there. Soon her sister came and we talked for a minute and we did leave a prayer. The whole atmosphere changed. As we left the Spirit of the Lord was there and it was just really special. It was a very Spiritual testimony and spiritually fulfilling experience.
Today the Behns were again to Church. Both Sunday School and Fast and testimony meeting. They are so special. I surely love this family.
Tonight we also had a special District Meeting. I taught the whole District a whole bunch of stuff on the life of a Missionary. Especially since we have both Sister Leininger and Sister Amacker who are quite and brand new respectively. It was a good feeling to teach freely and cover so much. Hershal Pederson and President Roylance sure have taught me a lot.
I feel really good about being a Missionary. Now to get our family Behn in the water.
My new scripture Alma 8:10!
November 17, 1976
Well it’s been a week and ½ since I’ve written. This has been probably one of the toughest weeks of my Mission. The Behn’s had problems Tuesday night when we left and I was really upset. We didn’t have time to talk it over with them because we had Sister Leininger with us. It was bad but we had to leave. So we went by Thursday morning with Sister Amacher. She really has a great Spirit, wow, I am really impressed with her. She and I talked with Frau Behn Thursday and it seemed to go better.
Saturday, when we went by, they wouldn’t let us in. I about died. We went back a couple (30) minutes later and Oliver looked out the window and shut it real quick. Boy I was killed. I couldn’t believe it. Sunday I called and Herr Behn said that the kids where home alone that Frau Behn was sick and everything. I could tell something was wrong. We had an appointment for Tuesday so I said fine until then and he said okay also.
Tuesday came and she was sick still and it was just really discouraging but we went in anyway. I knew something was wrong and I knew that we had to get to the bottom of it. Well we did. I am amazed. I really can’t believe it. The problem ist folgendes. Frau Behn’s mother was messing around with some guy years ago. Well when she was having kids apparently there was a little question as to who the father was of Frau Behn. Well now all of a sudden Family matters have developed and Frau Behn wants to know for sure who her real father is. The thing is bad because this other guy has a family and all and now after all those years suddenly Frau Behn wants to know. Her whole family (mother, sister, etc.) want her to drop it but she wants to know.
Well from my standpoint I can only see one thing. This family belongs in the church. From the first day I met her I have felt a strong Spirit and the ability to believe. I feel that this whole situation is a move from the other side to thwart the progress of this family. I was so amazed at the nature and impact of this problem that I realized how important this family is. I knowthat this is a real problem and we better not lose this family because of it. Somehow we have got to get the Lord’s help on behalf of this family.
This past week has been real hard for me because before I found out the nature of this problem I thought they were going against what we have been teaching them. They still don’t understand very much. We have got to help them get testimonies of the Prophet Joseph Smith.
Well Saturday evening after they wouldn’t let us in and Sunday after they didn’t come to church I was down. I mean down. Well I didn’t know what to do and I was praying for help and it was just really tough. Well I opened my little white handbook and read the very first page about my calling. I had sort of a special revelation that Sunday afternoon and I realized a little better what faith really is. I read about the nature and divinity of my calling and then where it says – “many will understand the will of the Lord in their lives” through our teaching and testifying. Well I have been praying and praying for the Lord to give me that spiritual assurance that this family would be baptized and become members. The same way I felt it when I knew they would come to church that Sunday. Well I haven’t even felt that Spiritual “yes” I was looking for and when they wouldn’t let us in Saturday I about died.
But after reading that it dawned on me, that those people who are “chosen” will hear the Lord calling and follow. Now that sounds pretty dumb because I know I’ve known that from the beginning. It’s just I always let my own personal and emotional feelings get too deep in the work. I do love this family though and I believe with all my heart that they will be members. I don’t know but I believe. It’s so hard to see discouragement but today the Lord really blessed me. If they are supposed to they will hear the voice of the Shepherd and they will follow. All we have to do is teach and love and believe for them and in them. It’s a great responsibility and calling that we have but it is the Lord’s work and he helped me understand that better today.
November 26, 1976
Thanksgiving – Zone Conference
My heart rejoices and gives thanks to the Lord at this special time in my life. Today we once again had the opportunity to sit at the President’s feet and learn from him. He inspires me so much. I love him. My heart rejoices that I can even be associated with him.
Today was again a very special Conference. He is slowly changing and molding this Mission to the way he wants it. Today he dissolved all Senior-Junior relationships and conveyed his ideas to us on consolidating the zones. It brings some neat new changes and some great advantages and responsibilities.
President Roylance taught us about Satan. He said he had felt for a long time he needed to talk about the power of the Adversary so that we could be prepared and could better fight him. He told us a little how the Devil works. How he is a very real power fighting against us. Hating us and trying to stop our personal efforts and our efforts here in Germany.
He then explained about Counterattacks. Why bad things happen right after good Spiritual experiences. The Devil makes his move right after we gain something Spiritually. A case study of this is Moses 1:11-19. I know this to be true also with our investigators. It is a constant battle. In fact we can assess the value of our work by how much resistance we feel.
All the prophets speak highly of Satan. He is a formable enemy and they respect him very much. None of them fear him because they also know how to overcome him. Satan fears humility and the Spirit of the Lord. We can pray always D&C 10:5 and walk in the paths of the Lord and we will be able to win.
This was a fantastic Conference. I learned so much. The Gospel is just opening up to me as I listen and learn from President Roylance. I am very thankful on this Thanksgiving. I love the Lord.
December 2, 1976
My heart is very heavy as I try to write a few words this morning. Its been a while since I have written because my feelings are so hard to crystallize on paper.
The events of the previous night ache in my soul. About 11:30 last night after I was long or maybe not too long asleep – I don’t know – the phone rang. I woke and finally made it there. It was Mom. I was surprised and felt as if I was in a pit. I couldn’t believe it, my whole world collapsed. And then after the wall hit me a little and as I listened to my dear Mother’s voice a feeling came over me. A feeling of peace – a feeling from the Lord. My Mom said as I told her about the feeling – ‘yes, we know he’s in good hands.’
I fought hard to control tears and emotions. I didn’t know what time it was. At first I thought it was early in the morning but after looking at my watch I realized that it was 11:30. Slowly, surely I was myself again and for the first time in my life I knew what it meant to believe. To really believe. This true church of God means so much to me and my family, The Spirit bore witness to me last night that my Grandfather was in good hands.
There was so much I wanted to do with him. So much I had to tell him and so much I wanted to hear again. So much I couldn’t know. I called him just a few months ago on his birthday. He was so tickled. Mitzie wanted me to call him after his last stay in the hospital but I had faith that everything was going to be alright. That faith is still there. Everything is alright. I feel that this is the right thing and the right way. To me I feel that our last conversation on his birthday is eternal. The feelings we both felt for each other are hard to express and at that time, surprised, happy, in good Spirits I feel we had the best special talk two people can have. He called me his son. With emotions high I will always carry that in my heart. I feel empty – and yet fully. I love my Lord Jesus Christ and I love my Grandpa and look forward to when I can be with him again.
December 7, 1976
So much has happened tome this past week. I am really suffering from lack of time to think it all out and sat it through.
My heart mourns the loss of the Grandfather but so many other things have happened it hasn’t really hit me yet.
Two weeks ago tomorrow Elder Pillmann went into the hospital because of back pains. Dr. Delahon had gotten a hold of him and really messed things up. Well it wasn’t all that bad we had thought and then they found a place on his thigh that was numb. Elder Pillmann had a terrible attitude anyway and it’s just hard to say how sick he really was. Finally after tests and 5-6 days in the hospital the President pulled him out. It was quite a decision, one which was made by a lot of help from the Lord and a special phone call to Salt Lake. There were a lot of factors. One very important one was Elder Pillmann’s attitude and then came money. He was being support totally from tithing and his hospital and medical bills through these last few months have been 23,000 DM or about $8,000. That’s a lot to put out from sacred Church funds for an Elder that finds it hard being here.
Anyway Tuesday I called President Roylance and had a good talk with him about the whole thing. Because of my calling as Elder Pillmann’s D.L. he leveled with me and told me all the facts and details. Elder Pillmann was being sent home. It was a Medical Release but honorable or dishonorable I don’t know or want to know. The problems were mental, emotional, and spiritual that led to his sickness, and as soon as he was taken out of the hospital and told he was going home he was a new man. He called Tuesday night and we saw him at 5:30 A.M. as he caught the train for home.
He was in good spirits but I sure wasn’t. It hadn’t really hit him like it did me. I felt so bad because I knew it meant missing out on the best 4 months of his Mission. I also felt maybe there was more I could have done. It was really hard on me and I sure loved him.
That was early Wednesday the 1st of December when we sent him home. The very same night the phone rang and I learned from my family that Grandpa died. That was so hard. I have never lost anyone in my family like this. After they hung up I stayed in Frau Rumpf’s Avon room for a long time, all alone, crying. The hardest part was being here alone in Germany. Not being able to be with the family. I’ve been down a little all week and I know it still hasn’t really hit me.
Thursday after a long night with little sleep we had a good day. We arranged our schedule so that I could help Elder Kettner teach a discussion in the afternoon and so we could visit Elder Johnson. We worked 12 hours and that night we taught Behns. And that was a long tough discussion. She is so proud. She thinks its right to have sex before marriage and says nothing can change her opinion. It’s bad. She says it’s the natural thing when 2 people love each other. But they should only do it when they intend on getting married. What happens if they intend but don’t and lose their virtue in the meantime? She can’t and won’t see that far. We tell her it comes from God but she can’t believe it. He fights tithing. We bore strong testimony and I especially felt the Spirit because of Grandpa. They did too. They were really touched but all they can say is that it’s me – not God but me. We tell them and teach them but she thinks it’s us personally not the Lord that has given it to us.
Friday, December 3 was a day I’ll never forget. It started out pretty normal as a preparation day. I didn’t write but 2 letters. One to Mitzie and one to Grandma. At 3:00 we were suppose to meet Herr Morderau at the chapel – he never came. I walked around with Brother Fricke for a while. He’s older and it gave me some comfort to walk around and inspect the yard and things like Grandpa and I used to do down at the field.
Anyway afterwards we went to the Elders apartment to check up on them.
December 7
They weren’t there which made me happy. See the problem was Elder Johnsons eyes. He had had some real pain in his eyes and just in back of them out in Leer. Then he went to Berlin for a week and it hit him again. Elder Howard our new Assistant told me that the President brought him here on a hunch. Well, Monday he and Elder Kettner were tracting and his eyes really started hurting. He got dizzy and it really sent pains through his head. Well Elder Kettner blessed him and they stayed home Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. We went by every day. His eyes still really hurt. He had also heard of Elder Pillmann going home and it really upset him. He was really scared that the same thing would happen to him. He was really discouraged. I really felt bad that he was so discouraged more than anything else. Thursday after we taught Frl. Kolbe I brought the Sisters over and we had District Meeting. I told them how I felt we were all being tested and how it required our faith to get over these hard times. Elder Kettner bought some Kuchen and we all had a good little happy moment. Elder Johnson even felt better as we talked so positively and with so much faith and then kneeled in prayer. I felt good.
I was also very tickles as we found them not at home because that meant they were out and Elder Johnson was doing better. We had a film abend at the Church but I knew we didn’t have anyone coming. We had had so many problems and advanced investigators that I hadn’t even invited anyone. So I brought the Film, “And Should We Die.” We had to put the film abend on because it was in the Gemeinde Blatt and there was always the chance that some members would bring someone (which they didn’t). So we played the films ourselves. First we sang some songs and then the films. Afterward we sang a song or two and messed around a little. Finally about 10 or 15 after 9 I realized that it was getting late. So I said ‘let’s have a prayer and go.’ So I called on Elder Johnson to give the closing prayer. We were spread all over the room but he and I and Elder Kettner were standing over by the door. Elder Johnson started to pray. He thanked the Lord for our blessings and that we could come together as a District. He then thanked him that He had helped him with his eyes problems. I can’t remember if he said anything more than that or not. I don’t think he did. I felt him teeter. I opened my eyes and was able to catch him as his knees buckled. He was limp. It was all Elder Kettner and I could do to get him on the table. He was in a seizure of some kind. I looked down and he had urinated his pants. His arms were locked across his chest and his eyes were open. I was scared. It looked like an epileptic fit. We tried to talk to him but he was gone. I pulled out my oil and told Elder Kettner to anoint him. He did. I then laid my hands on his head and sealed the anointing. Thinking back on it I was really scared and I forgot to say ‘we seal this anointing to the recovery of your health.’ I did of course say everything else right and stated the authority which we held. I tried to relax. I called on the powers of the Lord to bless Elder Johnson and I felt that something had taken over him, either a medical seizure or the evil power so I blessed him that whatever it was to depart. I then called upon the members of my District to have faith and I really believed that thought on faith we could heal him. I really believed that. I finally relaxed and became calm. Elder Kettner and Elder Davis felt me relax but none of us felt Elder Johnson relax. I felt that we needed to get some help for him so I said amen and I felt that it was now a medical problem. I ran upstairs and used Brother Fricke’s phone to call the office. I called and told them to send some help that Elder Johnson was really bad, had had a seizure and all. I came back down stairs where things hadn’t improved. He couldn’t breath very good and we were concerned he would swallow his tongue or something. He was chewing gum very naturally. I stuck my fingers in his mouth to pull the gum out, forgetting of course his state. He clamped down hard. I couldn’t pull my index finger out. He nearly bit it off before I could pull it out with Elder Kettner’s help. He was pretty bad. I ran upstairs again in an attempt to get a hold of President Roylance. Elder Stephens answered and said the Assistants were on their way and that President Roylance was at the Stake Center. There was nothing I could do. I came back down stairs and this time when I walked into the room I could sense fright. My District members were scared stiff. Elder Kettner looked at me and said that he tried to talk but couldn’t. It dawned on me that something was going on inside of him. At that moment I felt he was possessed. I looked at everyone and they were scared and frightened. But the Lord was with me. I kneeled beside him commanding my District members to also kneel. With one arm around his head and one arm across his arm and shoulders I started to pray. I prayed with every ounce of my soul. I plead, and begged God to bless Elder Johnson. I prayed and prayed the Lord to show mercy upon us and strengthen our faith that we could have the faith and power to overcome the power that had a hold of Elder Johnson. I called upon the District members to have faith and to exercise their faith that we could heal Elder Johnson. In those minutes I realized what faith really is. I kept on praying till I felt that I had about drained all the power and faith that I had. In that moment Elder Johnson started to bounce around. Violently inside. I held tighter and prayed more fervently. It was all Elder Kettner and I could do to hold him on that table. It strengthened me.
Then Elder Johnson started to moan. Deep inside he groaned and moaned. I felt that it wasn’t Elder Johnson, but whatever it was that had him. When I heard that it gave me strength because I knew it was hurting. It strengthened my faith and I continued to call upon the Lord, now with added confidence and faith. The moaning got louder and more grotesque and it gave me at least strength because I knew that the power of the Lord was overcoming. About that time I heard the knock of the Elder downstairs on the door. Right in the middle of my prayer I told Elder Davis to run down and open the door. He did. With that added Priesthood in the building and with the power of the Lord it was over. By the time the brethren had climbed the stairs and reached the room where we were, it was over. Elder Johnson had regained consciousness. I looked and he had urinated again on the table all over. We pulled him off the table and sat him down. He was in pain but conscious. He didn’t know what had happened. I explained things to the Assistants. We decided it best to take Elder Johnson to the Mission Home for the night. We stood him up but he couldn’t walk so I picked him up under the shoulders and Elder Thornock grabbed his feet and the two of us packed him down the stairs and out to the car. Elder Johnson is such a special Elder. As I was carrying him out he said ‘I’m sure sorry you have to carry me out. It’s a good thing you’re strong Elder Rogers. I just can’t walk right now.’ I really love him. I know he was in a lot of pain. He said he felt like he had been fighting. His whole body was sore and exhausted. We packed him out to the van and Elders Thornock, Williams, and Howard took him to the President.
I went back into the church and called the President. I had a good but short little chat with him. That was the story.
Before we left we all kneeled and thanked the Lord for all his help. All 5 of us prayed one after the other. We poured our souls out to him in gratitude.
That night Elder Johnson didn’t sleep but maybe 15 minutes despite the heavy sedative the doctor gave him. His eyes really pained him. The next morning President Roylance and Elder Thornock took him into the hospital. We know that it is now pretty serious. There is a small capillary in his head somewhere that has swollen and leaks blood into his spinal fluid. It is probably close to his eye nerves because that’s what hurts. It is very serious. It looks like it will lead to brain surgery and that’s pretty scary. We will be fasting and praying for Elder Johnson.
I really feel bad and know that his parents are really worried. It is a very touchy situation. I’ve been really bothered by all of this and look forward to Friday when I can talk with President Roylance about it.
Friday, December 10
Today after a long week I had a long talk with President Roylance. It helped me so much. The experience of last Friday night has really been working on me. We had a good long talk about the big question of why it happened. Maybe I can express a few feelings first. Feelings that I’ve been having. Because of the Zone Conference just 2 short weeks ago on the power of the adversary I felt like maybe we were making something out of nothing. When I am honest with myself I know what happened and can peg those other feelings to temptations of the Devil to not believe it. He has really been working on me. I needed to find out a few things from President Roylance to realize the whole picture.
He says he considers the power of Satan in “play” when an Elder trips and sprains his ankle. In this situation we believe Elder Johnson was discouraged and very sick. In his down condition it would have been no trouble at all for him to slip in and stir things up. It takes hardly any faith to realize how easy it would be for Satan to be present in such a poor state of medical health – and its only one step farther to realize what actually did happened. President Roylance feels directly responsible. He is so neat. I love him with all my heart. He said he felt that if he talked about Satan that he was asking for it. He feels this is a direct answer to his last Zone Conference. ‘Okay if you’re going to talk about me and teach your Elders I’ll show you how much power I have.’ He really did. The President feels very real how this is a direct answer. Satan strikes where we are the weakness. I’ve since learned a lot. We talked it all over. Over an hour. It was great.
I’m learning how to decide what is inspiration from the Lord, from Satan and what is from ourselves. Its been a great learning experience for me. I sure needed this talk because of the temptations I’ve had not to believe what I know to be. I love the Lord and I am growing. This is a big ball game. I’m here in Altona where the front lines are and I thank the Lord and rely on him always.
Saturday December 18, 1976
I don’t even know where to start to tell the things that have happened. I can’t put it all together myself and I its very hard to put it on paper, but I know it will be worth a lot to me in the future.
Elder Johnson has been in the hospital 2 weeks now. Today he passed away. At 1:00 P.M. his heart stopped as a result of 2 brain hemorrhages last Thursday. Thursday afternoon we went in to visit him and spend some time with him as we had been doing. When we (Elder Davis, Elder Kettner and myself) reached his station the nurse said he had had a cramp and that things were bad – that we’ll have to come back in a few hours. Well we went downstairs and I called Elder Meacham. I told him the report and we started to go. I reached the revolving doors of the hospital and I was impressed to at least see if a Doctor could tell us more. It was an impression I followed. We went back up to his floor and there we saw him. They wheeled his bed by us and I saw his face. That gaze was in his eyes. He was unconscious as before. It really shook me. There was a Doctor there who saw us. He came over and asked if we were there for him and all. He asked me if I was familiar with the diagnosis. I said yes so he proceeded to tell me how he had had an attack at 2:00 and then again at 3:00. As he told me he was very very nervous. He rung his hands together and I could feel that it was very serious.
Well I immediately called President Roylance. He knew. He had heard my first report from Elder Meacham and realized that the German word cramp means seizure – something neither Elder Meacham nor myself knew. He had called the hospital and talked briefly with the nurse. I told him what had happened. We had a good talk. He was very glad that I followed that impression and was there when it happened although I feel that we didn’t do anything. We were just there. Well he went to the hospital after they found out a little better what was going on.
I called the President that night. We had a long talk. He told me everything. He leveled in every way with me. It was very hard for me because the rest of my District didn’t know really how serious and how bad it was. As of the first night he was hooked up to an artificial respirator to even keep him alive. We were afraid he wouldn’t make it through the night. The blood hemorrhage was applying pressure to the brain that affected the areas of muscle and motor function. It looked very bad. That was sure a tough night for me.
The next day was Friday. It just so happened that we had to go in to get swine flu shots on Friday. Well we as a District were all very upset so I called them together for a prayer meeting. We were also fasting. I called President Roylance at about 8:30. He had already been over to the hospital and told me that things had worsened. He had developed circulation problem and things were complicating. It looked bad. Very bad.
Well we held our prayer circle before we went over to the office. The hospital called about 2:15 as we were getting vaccinated. Then President Roylance left. About 3:30 he and Sister Roylance came back and he told my District he wanted to talk with us. I was very nervous.
Well he called us and the office brethren all in and laid it on the line to us. I think that was the hardest single moment for President Roylance or for us. He told us that they ran an EEG on Elder Johnson and there was no impulse. The circulation problem had developed in the head region and his brain had died. The test was negative. President Roylance said he would be a vegetable if he lived. He then explained how his other body functions were failing and that it was a matter of time. Then he opened up to us. With tears in my eyes I watched and felt of President Roylance’s Spirit as he expressed himself to us. First he talked about faith and how it works. He told us the story of Marion G. Romney
December 18, 1976
how when he was younger he and his wife exercised their faith for something. It didn’t ever happen even after years of trying. Well, President Romney said he guessed he didn’t understand much about faith. He made a study on faith and realized that if we ask – “and if it be right” etc. it shall be given us. President Roylance explained how he felt that the Lord was very pleased with our exercising of faith. He said we had done all we could. We had all prayed and fasted. His ward and Stake Presidency had fasted. The whole Mission had fasted. His name was in the prayer circle of the Council of the Twelve. The Lord had heard and answered our prayer. It wasn’t the answer we were looking for but it was the Lord’s will. It’s so important that we understand that.
President Roylance explained these things to us. He explained how when in these kind of situations when so much faith is applied and a turn comes the worse that is usually pretty good indication of the Lord’s will for us. Sometimes people have applied so much faith and pleaded so hard that the Lord has granted them things that actually weren’t right. For example when Joseph Smith gave the first 100 pages of the B of M to Martin Harris.
After these ideas were exchanged President Roylance explained a few things that just touched my heart. He told us very freely and openly the struggle he had had. He had blessed Elder Johnson that he would live.
And now he was going to die. He said I don’t know why but as I laid my hands upon his head maybe my own personal desires were too strong. He was puzzled, very disturbed by it all and he told us he had been on his knees often to understand the Lord’s will. I was so touched by his feelings. I think about that myself. He is such a special man. We had a very special session there yesterday afternoon. The Spirit of the Lord was very close. At the end President Roylance looked around the room and called on me to give the closing prayer. I wasn’t even surprised but I was very humbled.
I prayed to the Lord that he would help us to understand his will, I prayed that he would bless Elder Johnson’s family. I poured my heart out to the Lord in behalf of all of us. I was blessed with the words. It was a very special experience but oh so hard.
Well needless to say the District was down so we came over to our place and I made lunch. Beef stroganoff. Our District is very close and these trying times bring us even closer.
Today we had the Ward Christmas Party. It was really neat. Afterwards the office brethren let us know that Elder Johnson passed away at 1:00. It was hard to take. We had a big snowball fight with the kids and the District afterwards – I guess to let off steam. I sure needed to do something. I split my pants in the course of events. It was a sad day for Altona.
December 19, 1976
Today we went with the Assistants to Elder Johnson’s apartment to pick up his things for shipment home. It’s like a bad dream. I really can’t believe it. Elder Johnson was such a special Elder. Going through his things we found many special things. Note cards in his clothing for door approaches and all. Handwritten study sheets for scriptures, language, etc. He was very diligent.
Before we left Elder Williams told us that the Mission was going to hold a Funeral Service for Elder Johnson. A Service that would be taped and sent home. He then asked me if I would talk in it. He said that President Roylance and the Assistants felt good about extending me the invitation. I was shocked. I still am. I said yes but knew what a difficult assignment it was. I am very weak and my mind boggles at this assignment.
December 21, 1976
Today was a hard day. I honestly believe the toughest assignment of my life thus far was the talk I gave in Elder Johnson’s funeral. I spent a very tough day yesterday going over what I could say, what I should say, what was proper. What would his parents want to hear? It just didn’t come. Since Elder Johnson went into the hospital Elder Kettner has been with us here on the floor. Its been really tough on all of us, but especially on Elder Kettner.
Well, I finally got some thoughts together last night. Man I’m bad. I couldn’t hardly write it – after hours of thought and work. I have never even been this close to a funeral before. It’s all happened so fast with Grandpa and now 3 short weeks later Elder Johnson. I am really being tested and smoothed.
The Service was very beautiful. It was held in the Altona Chapel. The President conducted with Assistants Howard and Williams, and myself speaking. Elder Thomas Howard read a short history of Elder Johnson’s mission. Then Elder Jack Williams gave a talk followed by myself. That was hard. It was so hard. Elder Laven Thornock sang the opening and closing songs. O’ My Father and Sweet is the Work. The main speaker was President Roylance who spoke after I did. It was a very beautiful service. All the Missionaries from Hamburg were invited. It was taped and will provide a very special lift for Elder Johnson’s family at this time.
The main speaker was of course President Roylance. I wish I could write down the feelings I had as he spoke. My heart was very soft as he talked about the special feelings we all had for Elder Johnson. President Roylance impresses me. My life has been touched by his Spirituality and dedication. I love him. He explained the trials and tribulations that Elder Johnson went through and we of course with him. The special experiences in the hospital. Elder Johnson’s special and very humble character. He explained how Elder Johnson’s wish was just to get back on the work. “Will I be able to finish my Mission, President,” was his ever present question. President Roylance talked also on the Resurrection a little and some points of Doctrine. How Elder Johnson was never released as a Missionary and that this will be important to him on the other side. He will be engaged in a great Missionary work there.
Then President Roylance talked about feelings. His feelings, our feelings, and the true meaning of love. He told how Elder Johnson’s father wrote him a letter on how he killed a coyote. He went through every step of how he shot this coyote. How he tracted him down, got him in sight, took careful aim by leaning against a tree and then killed him. Then he said how he looked forward to the time when they could do that again. President Roylance with tears in his eyes expressed his feelings on how in his own special way that Elder Johnson’s father was telling him his love for him. It was so true. The love between father and son goes deeper than the I love you at the end of a letter. President Roylance explained how the first night he couldn’t sleep and went downstairs to talk to Elder Johnson. (That was the night I blessed him when he had his first attack. He stayed with Elder Thornock in the Mission Home.) That night Elder Johnson’s pain wouldn’t permit much sleep. So they talked. After an hour or so President Roylance decided he’d better get some sleep and was going to leave. But before he did he got down real close and put his cheek next to Elder Johnson’s and told him that he loved him. Elder Johnson didn’t say anything for a long time but he felt it. And as I listened to President Roylance talk it was confirmed to my Spirit that it was so. Love. In this world there is not enough of it. It was a very beautiful and Spiritual experience for me to have been so close to this experience and so close to these people. I love Elder Johnson and know that he is happy doing his heart desire. Teaching the Gospel. I also love President Glen M. Roylance for his special spirit and the insight he gives all of us on what life really is. This was a hard day for me but a very beautiful one indeed. I love this work and I am so grateful to the Lord that I can have these experiences.
December 24, 1976
Christmas Eve! What a day – gewesen. I’m writing this several weeks after it happened but I want to get my feelings down in this record. I always write in present tense.
Tonight was quite an experience. First we were at Pawlowskies. She is really a neat lady but like most Germans she has trouble with health problems and really suffers but really complains – but she’s better than most. Oh, well, we had a good time. She had wurst and potato salad just like Sister Horestech did last year for New Years. It was a good evening but we left at 10:00 to meet the sisters. Since Elder Kettner was transferred yesterday we are now a double-date District which is real bad.
Well we met the Sisters and went to St. Michael Kirche for Midnight Mass, even though it wasn’t a Catholic church they did have a 11:30 meeting. It was different. The music was beautiful I love that old church style of organ and choir music. I really love it. The Predigt was a little weird. The Pastor said that we shouldn’t try to understand god rather we should continue as we are and just follow. That’s the problem – they don’t know God.
We had to stand but it was still pretty neat. Sister Leininger and Sister Amacher got home real late. I had Sister Leininger call me to make sure they got home okay. It was 3:00. What a night.
Looking back I see that I should have realized what was going on but I didn’t. Sister Leininger I guess started having feelings for me and I think back and realize it was evenings like this one that probably gave her the chance. I really feel bad that it worked out for her the way it did – but I guess that’s what life is about. It’s a growing process. Well the story goes further.
January 21, 1977
Last night I read until 11:30 in the Ensign. I read the Special Issue just out on Eternity, Temple Work, and Family Records. It was good. As I ponder this record I realize how much of a worth it is to me. I also realize how incomplete it is at times, but it would be hard – very hard to capture everything. Today for example was so full it could be a book in itself. Let me see if I can write my feelings and the events of one day just as they happened.
First of all it was 6:30 before I could even open my eyes because I read so late, even though Elder Davis turned the light on at 5:45. I studied a little this morning and then it was time to go visit Herr Moderan at the Church. I called to see if he would be there and he said no. That was a big let down. He is really a great guy and he needs the Church so bad – but he just can’t put it together. Today was preparation day so we went and got haircuts. Before we did we ate breakfast – burned oatmeal. My companion is the only one I know who can burn instant oatmeal – but I love him anyway.
At about 11:00 after haircuts we walked into the office to grab showers as we usually do on Fridays. There was a funny feeling there. The President looked surprised to see me and I soon found out why. Elder Howard came and asked me where my companion was. By this time he was already in the shower. Well as it turned out Sister Rodeman in Lubeck hurt her back and Elder’s Meacham and Grunblicher were bringing her and of course her companion Sister Leininger to the Office – at 11:00. They were due to arrive any minute.
What a situation. We are going to laugh over this one in the years to come. Well of course we didn’t want Sister Leininger to see me. So they took me upstairs and hid me in the bedroom. Then when my companion was finished showering the Assistants waited till the coast was clear (closing the office door where Sister Leininger was) and then they snuck us out the side door. Elder Davis and I walked up the street instead of by the window and we got out. It was weird.
I wondered why President Roylance had a funny look on his face when I walked in. It was quite a deal. They day they had to sneak me out of the Office. This is a good one.
I sure feel bad though really about this situation. Sister Leininger sure has flipped for me and as a friend I sure don’t want to hurt her but it is hurting her Mission now I think. And that hurts me.
What a day.
Well after a thrown-together lunch of left-over Mulligan and Wurst, and also after the stadtbad for me and the weekly buying of groceries we had some time for letters. I wrote several today including one to Mr. Iverson to renew my Scholarship at Dixie.
Well there’s a lot more to write but I’m not going to make it. It was a weird day. I sure need to pray hard tonight. I love the Germans.
January 22, 1977
I’d like to finish just one more thing about yesterday if I could. We went down town to look at suits for a few minutes before we went on the work. On our way back we were in the crowded
S-Bahn train with a bunch of people. My heart ached as I watched this one guy (about 25) eat a brotchen. I could tell he was really hungry. He ate very carefully and picked up the crumbs and ate them. I guess you might say he was a slower person. Not retarded or anything just a slower person. I watch for 10 minutes as we traveled. He pulled out a little purse from inside his shirt and looked at his money. About 2-3 marks ($ 1) but in very small change. One Mark and some change. He looked hard at it, put it back, and felt his stomach. I really wanted to give him some money but I didn’t have any either. I just watched him. My heart yearned to help him or just be his friend but too soon he got up to leave. There were tears in my eyes as he stepped on my foot in passing and turned around to say “Excuse me.” I smiled at him. He was soon gone into the night. I prayed for him. I don’t know why people affect me like this sometimes, but it happens. I had just come from the city where everything revolves around money and materialism; and then to see one of God’s sons. It really touched me. My heart was full and I really loved that guy. I didn’t get a chance to talk to him about the Church but I still love him. I felt I ought to write these feelings down.
Today we took Fraulein Walbaum to a baptism. She is so stubborn I can’t believe it. We pray and work with her and she still isn’t there. We also had a real good discussion with Frau Luthje. She is seeing the importance of this great message. We know its not going to be long. She feels the Spirit when we go by. I want so bad to give her the joy that we feel. It is such a joy.
Today was another neat Sunday. I sure love Sundays. Our investigators didn’t come but there was a Special Spirit anyway. Tonight we had a good District meeting but it wasn’t the best I’ve ever had. I’ll do better next week.
January 24, 1977
Today was Marcia’s birthday. Seventeen years old! Wow I really can’t believe it. We are all growing up so fast it’s hard to believe. Time passes so fast. I really can’t believe I have only 3 short months left.
I haven’t even sent Marcia a card or Michelle in December for that matter. I’ll try and pick them both up something in the Schluss verkauf. I sure miss them though and wish them well on their birthdays.
Today I got a package from Sister Leininger. I can’t believe her. She wrote three long letters and threw them in with a bunch of other stuff. It really hurts. She is a good friend and for that reason I’d love to write back – but I can’t. I just can’t. She’s breaking rules and I know it’s going to hurt her but I’m not going to answer, I just can’t. It is really bothering me. She really is hooked. I can’t believe it. And she is really making some big plans. I feel pretty cornered and to even have this kind of a deal on a Mission. It’s bad. I’m not going to do anything. I feel good about how much she has grown in the last few months but I can’t handle what has happened since.
I pray to the Lord that she can understand and respect her own calling as a Missionary and cut this stuff out. After that phone call and this I guess I need to go talk to the President – again. She has really blown it and she can’t understand. Women sure let their feelings run them sometimes. I understand her and think a lot of her but she has got to grow up – a lot.
January 25, 1977
Today we had a good discussion with Fraulein Walbaum and committed her to further prayer and study. She is really stubborn but if you pound on her she reacts positively – so we need to just keep pounding. She’ll make it, but she needs to really humble herself.
We also had a very neat discussion with “Aunt B” – our Oma Frau Sorensen. She kneeled and prayed with us there at the end. She is so neat. The Spirit was really strong and she really felt it and has for a long time. She’s gaining a testimony but her family and her old age are problems for her. She feels that as soon as we go she will be lost and won’t know anyone at the Elbchaussee. It will be hard for her but I think she can make it. I have faith in her and the Lord. It looks good and wet.
January 26, 1977
We really have neat investigators. We taught Frau Luthje a “D” discussion tonight. It was great. She is good. I feel good about her. She’s going to come along and make it also. We also had a good discussion at Funcke’s tonight. They fed us Abendbrot and then we had a good long discussion. He just can’t believe and won’t make much effort to try. After a while it became time to go and he really didn’t want us back. So he played me in a game of Reversi in which I creamed him and embarrassed him and then we left.
January 27, 1977
Elder Reem is the new President Secretary. They are really moving things around this time I guess. Anyway his companion Elder Heintz is here and we have been zu dritt (threesome). I worked with him Thursday. He has a hard time with things. I also got to talk with Elder Howard this evening about this other problem. They’ll be sending a letter.
January 29, 1977
Today I was tausched with Elder Ghismeyer and Sister Sams. We had a real good day. We tracted hard in the morning and then had a couple of good discussions after lunch. I really think the world of both of them. Elder Ghismeyer is really good and determined. I sure love him. He will go a long way. He shows me pictures of him as a ski bum and I just really can’t believe it. He’s neat.
Sister Sams is really special. I really think the world of her. She’s a convert of 3 years and just really is great. She works like the Elders do. She speaks gunt German already and just does a good job. We had a great day together.
Tonight we went up into the Sisters gegend and taught a guy who they have been working with this week. It was weird. He needs the church bad but he has to get his own feet on the ground first. He lost his job and wife and kids and just really doesn’t have anywhere to turn to. While we were sitting there he calls his wife in Kiel and handed the phone to Sister Sams. She didn’t know what to do. It was bad. Anyway we told him to read more and we’d come back in a week or more. The Sisters realize this but they need to have a keen awareness of their callings. His kind of situation scares me.
January 30, 1977
My last Sunday in Altona. I didn’t know that though. I taught the Priesthood Class in the morning on “Agency.” It was pretty good – I guess. Lutkemins was in church that afternoon. We talked with him a little before on C-4, 5 but not much good was accomplished. We also ate at Brother Mirowe. That was neat.
In District Meeting I talked about the Gospel of Love. It was really a special meeting. We have a great District. I guess it was a pretty good one to end on because I found out today – that I’m gone.